On Long Distance Relationship - Pamela Kahar
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On Long Distance Relationship

This post is not about me. This post is about every one of you who’s currently missing your boyfriend/ girlfriend, who’s thousand miles apart from you; who live in other city or even country. This post is about those who are fighting with 5 or more hours difference; about those who are currently in Long Distance Relationship.
You know already that it’s hard to maintain the relationship. A lot of challenges. A lot of couples fail. But, some of them succeed. Let’s have faith that we won’t fail. Have been talking with some people about this matter, I think that there are two main reasons why it fails
  • ·Lack of communication

The thing is, we are not only separated by thousand miles, but also the time differences. When you want to talk to him/her, ask her opinion spontaneously, you just can’t. Sometimes, you want to talk about something or share stories at that certain time, but you can’t. Your afternoon, might be his dawn. Your afternoon, might be her midnight. Then when he/she text you back five or six hours after, you’re no longer want to talk about it. You’ve lost the moment already.

Share stories about what you do today and talk about whatever, even the stupid and silly ones are important. You guys are no longer in the same environment, how can he/she knows about your day if you don’t tell that person? Believe me, he/she really wants to listen to what you’ve been through these days.

If you don’t tell that person, how could you expect he/she understand about you when that person’s not even around you? I think, once you get used to not talking to each other, it will become habit. Then you start thinking that you guys are no longer connected. It leads to another negative thoughts, Should I end this relationship?

  • Warmth from other person.

Admit it, physical touch is important, especially for those whose love language is physical touch. When you’re extremely exhausted to the point that talking is also tiring, you just want to rest your head on his chest. You just want him/her to caress your head or hug you tightly. Supposedly, you can do it. Then you remember, Oh Crap, I’m in LDR!!

Then, there is this attractive young lady, funny yet a bit vulnerable. Or there is charming boy next door, mysterious yet caring at the same time. You find their presence is enjoyable. You are comfortable with them. That person is always available when you need someone to talk too. Your afternoon, is her afternoon too. Your night, is his night too! No time difference, no thousand miles distance.

You know that there’s a moderate to high chance you’d fall in love with that person. But you feel something’s intriguing. You choose to play with fire and think “It’s okay. we’re just friend.” Then, you continue seeing him/her.

Oh dude, come on! Don’t tempt yourself!!

It’s just a matter of time you’ll realize saying that he/she is just a friend is hypocrite.
I don’t judge. If you are tired enough or you want to find warmth from other person, do it. It’s your right. But, end your relationship first. Don’t cheat. You might have not kissed him/her yet. But, you often go out with that person. You feel happy about it. You know that it feels so wrong, but it feels so good at the same time. You can’t help it.
Just like lies, there’s actually no fair justification of white lie. Lying is still lying, so is cheating.
Those temptation, fling or whatsoever you name it.. It’s just a temporary
Just like the distance between you and your loved one.
When he/she comes back home for good.
There’s no happier moment than the time he/she hugs you back tighter
At that time of being you know that you’ve made the best decision..
That you chose to hug the same person all over again.

Being in LDR makes you learn a lot of stuffs. You realize that you don’t have to see that person to love them. Instead, it makes you think of how much you love them more than you can imagine. How the word ‘miss’ is not even close enough to describe how much you want to see that person.
They say distance means so little, when someone means so much. I think it’s too naive to think that way. But it’s true that love makes you fight a little bit much harder than you think you could.
 It requires two people to fight for this relationship. Otherwise, it will never work.
Always remember, you’re not a solo fighter. You have him/her.
featured image belongsto: abetterhappier
Pamela Kahar
[email protected]

A woman who is blessed to be a blessing. A marketer who reads and writes.

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